Doogan here and I’m lucky to be alive.
Responding to a generous invitation from resident Mandarin
magnate Dr. Koo, this reporter arranged for a visit to the interior in a
continuing quest for information as to the whereabouts of vanished American
chemist and inventor of Solium Distillate Rocket Gas, Dr. Raullo Ortega.
The first stop would be Dr. Koo’s rubber plantation, fifty
odd miles up river and surrounded by a snake infested mangrove swamp known
locally by the quaint title, ‘Evil Bog of Howling Devils’.
I was informed that the road to this honeymoon resort had
recently succumbed to a major mudslide induced by a minor volcano. To spare the
esteemed representative of Hearst News Services any discomfort during the
journey, Dr. Koo generously offered to convey this reporter to his destination
by private aeroplane.
High above the steaming bamboo hinterlands Dr. Koo’s pilot,
an inscrutable fellow known as Captain Wong, probably hoping to keep his
worldly passenger from being bored during the flight, decided to demonstrate
his aerobatic talents with some impromptu high altitude stunt flying. A sudden
inversion of the old box kite had this reporter grabbing for his seat belt,
but, due to some unforeseen maintenance error on the ground, the harness was
missing its safety clasp.
Faithful readers will recall my interview with the Great
Waldo Pepper, during which a similar situation confronted this reporter. My
barnstorming experience served me well because in short order I found myself
dangling over the jungle with only my wrist lashed to the case strap of my
trusty Remington Portable Typewriter that remained firmly wedged beneath my
seat.
After several minutes of violent rolling, Captain Wong
noticed my predicament and righted the aircraft. Upon our safe landing at Dr.
Koo’s estate Captain Wong was profuse in his apologies…. to Dr. Koo, and this
reporter sought out the nearest bottle of medicinal nerve tonic.
Until next time, turn the lights off Ma and let the cat out.
This is Doogan signing off.
