Doogan here and I'm lucky to be alive!
Despite being graciously entertained by Dr. Koo and his staff here at the good doctor’s rubber plantation, deep in the vast Boo Kong jungle, I have been subject to several unusual encounters with local fauna. Now, I’ve found snakes in my bed before but after a close call with an especially large specimen of deadly tropical spider lurking in my sock drawer I began to get extra cautious.
My faithful Remington portable, noiseless typewriter came to
my rescue, yet again, as I had just completed my last dispatch when I was
assaulted by a nasty little monkey with an immense cane knife. The fiendish imp
somehow managed to unlatch my window shutter, enter my room and was nearly on
me before I took notice. Diving beneath my desk to escape the tiny brute and
his waving cutlery I upset the typewriter and it fell with crushing force on top
of the pint sized assassin, ending his murderous career in short order.
Dr. Koo politely apologized for the incident and explained
that a rival plantation owner had experimented with trained apes as laborers
and since the failed endeavor the vicinity had been plagued by marauding bands
of knife wielding simians. I told my host to think no more of it and informed
him that P.T. Barnum once had a similar problem. In fact, Lon Chaney wore his
first makeup after receiving a prominent scar while working with Barnum’s
monkeys.
I concluded my investigation of the plantation, no closer to
finding any clues as to the whereabouts of vanished American engineer,
Professor Raullo Ortega, the noted creator of cold rolled radium foil.
I am unable to return to China Station by aeroplane as the pilot who brought me here, Captain Wong, suffered a fatal accident when the bridge across Dr. Koo’s ornamental crocodile pool collapsed suddenly and unexpectedly. The Captain had just left Dr. Koo’s office. Wong’s mishap reminded me of a similar incident with my third wife Sonja, who accidentally elbowed me into an alligator pond, while we were playing miniature golf at the Sarasota Springs Honeymoon Haven. Newlywed memories aside, I’m now seeking alternative routes back to China Station.
Until next time, turn the lights off Ma and let the cat out.
This is Doogan signing off.
