7: Dateline Boo Yi District / Woo Visits Warlord

Cub reporter Jimmy Woo here and I can’t say if Mr. Doogan is alive or not.

Since leaving for Dr. Koo’s plantation, no word has been received from the esteemed representative of Hearst News Services. This reporter is keeping his fingers crossed in hopes of hearing that Mr. Doogan is safe.

Meanwhile, following a tip from my aunt in Boo Yi district, I investigated a report that the notorious warlord Chun-King had entertained missing American physicist, Dr. Raullo Ortega, creator of the Zenon Televisor, at his remote mountaintop fortress. Taking advantage of my Uncle’s apothecary business I posed as a common peddler of herbs and snake venom potions and made the difficult journey up country to the Cliffs of Death.

The infamous bandit is a renowned hypochondriac so I had little trouble gaining entrance to the foreboding compound though I knew there was a good chance I might never leave. The afternoon passed as I waited for Chun to complete his daily round of summary executions and extortion meetings with local farmers. When night came I found myself in the presence of this minor Genghis Kahn.  

Chun King inquired if I stocked bear bladder or crocodile organ. It seems that the notorious warlord’s energetic new wife (his sixth I understand) is posing a daunting challenge for a husband well into his middle years. I could not supply the General with the requested medications but I did sell him a vial of thistle oil that, according to my uncle’s sales manual, makes a passable substitute.

In the course of my medical improvisation I was able to surmise that Dr. Ortega had been at the compound. On a balcony visible from the General’s chamber there stood a strange glass and steel device, which resembled a cannon of some sort. A servant confided that a westerner supervised the construction of the machine. This person, the servant informed me, used a wheelchair and spoke in an odd metallic voice. I was secretly ecstatic as this description matches that of our lost scientist.

Unfortunately, the notorious warlord’s previous physician suffered a heart attack while being suspended by rope from the fortress walls by soldiers who were betting on how high a doctor would swing. I have been taken on as the official medical expert of Chung King’s staff. Further reports will be submitted when I can make arrangements with local smugglers.
Until next time, turn your lamp off Mrs. Doogan and allow your cat to roam free. This is Jimmy Woo signing off.